Wednesday, August 19, 2009

Bizarro World

You better get out your winter coats because I think hell is officially frozen! That girl that slapped you across the face is now your girlfriend. Your mean, old, fourth grade teacher, Mrs. Dockery, has all of a sudden shown her softer side and has taken a liking to you. The bully that just gave you the biggest wedgie you've ever had ( I mean it's so severe you can actually taste the cotton in your whitey-tighties) just gave you back your lunch and apologized! You just checked the mail and you received your first dividend check from that stock you've held for the past 20-years. Your teenager actually did his chores and mowed the grass.....without being told to do so!!! Wow, what is this world coming to?

Next your going to tell me that Brett Favre, the hated Brett Favre who ruled the frozen tundra of Lambeau Field of the hated rival Green Bay Packers, just signed to play for the beloved Minnesota Vikings! Yeah, right! And the miserable Herschel Walker trade never happened, right? OK, so the Walker trade did happen. That one still hurts.

But it's true. Brett Favre is wearing purple. Bizarro world. Helicopters flew overhead yesterday as his motorcade drove from the airport in Minneapolis to the the Vikings' practice facility. Grown men cried and sprinted across parking lots in suits and ties to get a look at the guy who will turn 40 during this NFL season, the guy who they're certain will take the Vikings to their first Superbowl since the late '70s.

Favre is certainly an upgrade from what was on the team's roster before yesterday. The biggest question is, at 40 years old is there enough duct tape and cortisone to keep his right arm attached to his body and on the field for a full 16 games and then, potentially, 3 or 4 more in the playoffs? Time will tell.

There is a bit of excitement in the air for this lifelong Vikings fan. The quarterback issue has finally been addressed for this team....if you call signing a 40 year old quarterback who just had surgery and admits he still has a tear in his right rotator cuff, addressing the issue.

Excuse me, I've got to go tell my teenager to cut the dang grass!